I think I'm grumpy for three main reasons:
1. I'm on the Herceptin until next February. February! Until this port is out of my chest and they stop sticking me with needles, I can't consider myself done.
2. I'm not convinced that there will be no side effects. As I was sitting in "the chair" for number six I was watching Robin Roberts on television telling America that she has developed a bone marrow disease called MDS as a result of the chemotherapy she received while being treated for breast cancer five years ago. Totally and ridiculously unfair.
3. I don't know how much more my body can take. I literally feel like I'm falling apart.
I know, get a grip. I should be happy the worst is over. Not to mention the fact that Herceptin is a relatively new drug that has had amazing results in boosting the survival rates in people with my type of cancer. Hopefully when I get through this round I will start to regain some of my energy and perk up a little! We are headed to Ocean City next week for some r and r which won't hurt either...
Hang tough Michelle. You are doing an awesome job and you look great. We know how difficult chemo is, but it will get better !! The threat of secondary cancers because of chemo sucks. I have panic attacks every time Scott has blood work done because he is a prime candidate. Take one day at a time and stay positive. Hope to see you soon when we are in the "hood".
ReplyDeleteDiane and Scott
It can be darn hard to be joyful at the end of chemo treatments. So many people feel similar to how you describe the experience – there’s a relief, and yet . . . it’s not over. The emotional stuff is still there, and I guess next stage is where you start working through that (in my experience, and from what I’ve seen from the ladies in our community).
ReplyDeleteYou’re getting there and I hope each day is a little easier than the last. Soon you’ll be running up stairs and looking at that new hair. Those moments are good ones. Now that chemo is done, you’re on your way.